Altar My Longing For Approval

Hello, and welcome to the Salt Church Podcast. Thank you for tuning in to this week's message. Join us as we explore God's Word, providing practical teaching for day-to-day living. The message you are about to hear was recorded live at our Sunday morning worship experience. If you would like to learn more about Salt Church, please visit us at saltchurch.

org. We hope that you are encouraged by today's message. So, we are in a series called Alter Ego, and not the type of alter you're thinking about. We're talking about A-L-T-A-R. Alter Ego.

And we're learning to alter our ego. What is an alter? Well, if you're not familiar, and most people know what an alter is, but if you're not familiar with what an alter is, it's something symbolic of laying something down. Something precious, something significant, maybe sacrificing something before that. They call it the altar of God.

We see it through the altar of God. We see it through the Old Testament. We first saw it through Noah, who, when he came off the ark, he made a sacrifice to God. He built an altar to God, and we see it. And it's very symbolic of laying things down.

And then, ego. What is our ego? That's how we think of ourselves, whether it's our belief system, or our self-esteem. And unfortunately, some people have really high egos, right? They think a lot about themselves.

On the other hand, there are those that have really low egos, and we want to alter our ego. We want to lay our ego before God so that we can become who God intended us to be, so that we can be our best selves in light of God. So we are looking at our alter egos today. And our goal is that we lay down some things. We lay down some things.

So last week, we had a condensed service outside because all of you were freaked out about something in the water, and I kept getting texts and emails, and everybody's like, I'm staying in, and stuff like that. And I didn't want to stop having church because I love having church. I love Jesus. And so we had a condensed service last week outside, and the rest of them, a portion of the people went to the pop-up church last week on the beach. And next year, we're even thinking about being a part of that.

So since this is going to start being a normal thing, I think our church is going to start participating in that. Because y'all aren't going to come anyway because y'all are going to be afraid of traffic and stuff. So why not go out there and worship on the beach? Amen? Yeah, thank you for that hand clap.

Amen. Yeah. It's okay, Hillary. I saw you start clapping, and then she looked around and says, nobody else is clapping. Hey, it's okay to clap at salt church, okay?

It's okay to do that. So we talked about inadequacy last week. Yeah, there you go. Hallelujah. Yeah.

We talked about inadequacy last week, and that is not up yet because I'm going to record that through a podcast and put it up online. So expect that up this week. Next week's going to be a really good one because we're going to be talking about laying down our right to be offended. Because we believe that sometimes we have a right to be offended, right? We think, well, I'm offended, and we hold on to those things, but we're going to release those on the altar.

But I think today is a really, really significant one, and that's our longing for approval. The need to please, right? It's not the need for speed. It's the need to please, and many of us have that need to please, and perhaps you've made decisions about yourself, about life, about directions you're going based on what other people think or say about you. And often we are controlled by what other people do and say.

So there's some signs that you might be a people pleaser if, if you want to say it like that, you know. If you have any of these things, there's many things that it possibly could be, but I thought these were really significant things. You might be a people pleaser if you worry about what others think, right? What do others think about me? Maybe me as a public speaker, I think I kind of struggle with this because I often are concerned about what other people think after service.

Hey, what did you think about that message? Was it good? What part did you like or not? Or somebody tells me, I don't really like the way you teach. What?

You don't like the way I teach? You know, what do I need to do differently, you know? And did I say the right thing? Did I say enough? Did I go back and review in this area?

And I pick things apart based on what I think other people think about my message instead of what God thinks about our message. Maybe you're the type of person who posts on social media and you go back after two minutes and nobody's liked it yet. And then you're offended, right? I had the perfect little, you know, picture of me and I even got the perfect shade, you know, and I centered it right. And I got the border and I put the little saying, you know, you type in the little saying at the bottom.

Man, that's a great quote. Man, somebody's going to like that. And you put it up there and nobody says anything. You might be a people pleaser if that bothers you. Or if you fix your hair five times in the morning because it just doesn't look.

Or you go through five different hairstyles within a month. Or if how many of you changed your clothes more than twice this morning, right? It's okay to be honest and vulnerable here in church. George's guy, he changed three t-shirts this morning. You might be a people pleaser if that happens.

And so let's be honest. If you fall in any of these categories of thinking about others, just raise your hand and be honest. Yeah, I deal with that, Pastor. I deal with that, Pastor. Yeah, and some of you that didn't raise your hand, you're worried about what people think.

So maybe we have a good message here to talk about today. The second thing that you might be a people pleaser if you are often overly sensitive. Do you find yourself sensitive when somebody says something or does something? Do you find yourself catching, like thinking about what they're talking about, like quickly being offended? I can have 100 compliments about my message.

People can say how wonderful it is. I can have pats on the back and one person says one negative thing and I feel like I'm a failure. And in so many ways, we all feel that way. Maybe somebody didn't say anything about that new outfit you wore today that you changed three times. You know, you had three different outfits and you got this new outfit.

They're going to like this. Maybe somebody didn't say anything about that and it kind of hurts you or offends you. Or maybe that friend calls or texts you and they don't, or you text or call that friend. Let's revert it there. And they don't instantly contact you back.

And you're like, what did I do? What did I say? Are they upset with me? What's going on? I had a young man a couple of years ago.

I didn't contact him back within five minutes. And he sent me another text. Did I do something wrong? Am I, you know, and it's just like, no, no, I just didn't get your, you know, sometimes you don't have your phone by, you know, I can't respond on time. And I actually had somebody on Facebook contact me because I didn't accept their friend request after a day.

And I just didn't know the friend request was there. I mean, I, you know, and, and, and they felt offended or did I do something wrong? Did I, maybe you're that person. Maybe you're easily offended or you're, you're easily, you're, you're very sensitive. Another thing is you, you compromise your values.

This is a big one. You compromise your values. You might be a people pleaser if you compromise your values. Maybe you're a young lady here and you aim to love God and honor God with purity. And you, you've started dating this young man and in fear of hurting his feelings, he's trying to push you into the bedroom.

And for fear of hurting his feelings or wanting to, to make him, to please him. Maybe you've compromised some areas or you're thinking about compromising some areas. Maybe you're a guy and if you know anything about guys, guys hang around guys. And when they hang around guys, they say and do things that may compromise their values. Maybe there's a dirty joke going around or maybe.

Maybe you slip a few words that you normally wouldn't because you don't agree with those values, but you do it because you don't want to be the weirdo in the group. You want to laugh along with them. Or maybe you're working hard on your debt so that you can honor God with what He's given you, but you keep constantly buying things. You don't need to please people that don't really care anyway, right? And that's what we do.

We buy things. We put things on. We do that for the sole purpose. We compromise our values for the purpose of pleasing other people. Or maybe you have a hard time saying no.

Maybe that's you. I have a hard time saying no. Like somebody asked you to do something and you're like, oh yes, I'll do it. But inside you're like, no, I don't have time to do it. I don't have the energy to do it.

Because you want to please others. Any of these categories, if you fall in these, you might have trouble with pleasing people. Why do we do that? Because our egos are significantly insecure. We have insecure.

We want to please people. We want to affirm people. We want to be approved by others. We want people like us instead of having a really strong ego. Obsessing or becoming obsessed with what people think about you is the quickest way to forget about what God thinks about you.

The quickest way of becoming or becoming obsessed with what people think about you is the quickest way to forget what God thinks about you. Proverbs, let's go to scripture and see this. Proverbs 29, 25 says, the fear of men or man will prove to be a snare. But whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe. The fear of man.

We're afraid of what men think. We were afraid of how men will react. And it can prove to be a snare. It can be a trap. The language from that, if anybody in the days this scripture was written, heard that word snare in its original context, in its original language, the moquish is how you pronounce that word in the original Hebrew.

They would have understood exactly what that means. If you've ever seen a picture of a hunter who has a hook in their hand and they grab the animal by the jaw or by the skin and they have the animal that they, the prey that they have on their back and they're walking with it, that's exactly what they would have saw. They would have saw a moquish. It is a moquish. It is a snare.

The fear of men is a trap. It's a snare. But whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe. Fear of people. Here's the thing.

Fear of people is idolatry. The fear of people is putting people over God. It's thinking about people's opinions over God's opinion. And what we're doing is asking people to meet a need that only God can meet. Because nobody is going to, not everybody is going to be pleased with you, are going to love you, are going to think well of you all the time.

In fact, in most cases, you're always going to have somebody who doesn't agree with you. There's always going to be somebody who doesn't, it isn't pleasing. People pleasing is always a trap. And it's putting the approval of people ahead of God. And we make people too big.

That's what we do. We make people too big. And we make God too small. And only God can meet that need. This is the greatest limiter in our lives.

I believe that. It's just limitations that are placed in what God has for us or wants us to be or what he has for us for the future. For instance, maybe you're a parent and you want to please your kids and you're doing everything to please your kids. You want to earn your kids respect. So you do things and you even compromise certain values and for certain types of instructions because you want to please your children because you want to be a good parent.

You want to be a buddy. But let me tell you this. As a parent, you are not a buddy. You are a guide. You are a spiritual guide.

You are directing their life. You are helping them become who God intended them to be. And you cannot be their best friend because if you are their best friend and that's all you are, one day they may like you today, but they will not respect you in the future. In fact, they will not see you the way that they need to see you as an instructor, as a guide. If you're a leader in your school, for instance, maybe you're a young person and you're running for leadership in your school, you are not going to always be able to go along with what everybody says.

As a leader, you have to go against the flow sometimes and you have to be a little different and you have to think a little different. Maybe you're in a leadership in business, business leadership. There are some times in business where people will like you and will cheer you on, but there are other times you will have to make some difficult calls. You will have to make some difficult decisions that most people will not understand. That is the betterment for everyone.

And you cannot be consumed about what other people think. If you're going to be a leader, if you're going to be a standout, even if you're going to be a follower of Jesus, if you are a follower of Jesus, do not be consumed with what people think about the way you live, about the way you act, about the way you serve, the way you dedicate your life, because guess what? They're not going to think it's correct. You're just going to be different. We are different people.

When you become followers of Christ, you do things different. You say things different. You act things different that may be against what everybody else thinks, because as Christians, we follow God. We don't follow the approval of man. And many of us, for this reason, have the disease to please.

We have the disease to please. So how do we overcome the disease to please? How do we overcome the disease to please? Well, there's two points I want to make. First of all, focus on pleasing God instead of people.

Focus on pleasing God instead of pleasing people. I love how the Apostle Paul says, obviously, I'm not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ's servant. Galatians 1.10 in a new living translator.

Obviously, I'm not trying to earn the approval of people. I love how he says that. I'm not. Obviously, even in that day, it hasn't changed. People were not agreeing with Paul.

We're not agreeing with the ministry. And sometimes even in the direction it was going. But he says, I'm not here to approve people or receive approval from people, but of God. And I would not even be a follower of Christ if it was about people, if it was about the person that was directing me in a certain direction. I want to be a God pleaser.

My perfect example of this is when I was one of my first jobs, actually, out of college. I worked for the state of North Carolina and the Department of Commerce. And I had this great Christian man. I mean, God just blessed me with a really cool leader in my very first job. And he was a Christian man.

And I wasn't walking with the Lord then. And he actually was a part of the process of getting me back where I was supposed to be and rededicating my life to the Lord. And then eventually ministry came after that. But Mack was a really cool guy. Loved, loved, loved the Lord.

And he wasn't pushy. He wasn't openly, you know, Bible beating or anything like that. Obviously, when you work in a government environment, you're not allowed to speak about your faith a lot. But he lived it out. He lived it out.

And people saw that. And people. Respected that, and sometimes it would offend people. And Mac, I remember, never forget it. Mac was called into the office of Human Resources one week, and his boss was there, and the Human Resources officer was there, and they told him, there is somebody on your floor that is terribly offended by you, because you promote your Christianity, you talk about it all the time, you're playing your Christian music, you're doing all these things, and she feels that you are oppressing her with your religion, that it's messing her up.

Obviously, Mac never did any of that. He never threw the Bible at anybody. He was a very pleasant man. He respected everyone. He respected other people who may have walked other faiths.

But just because of who he was, because of the way he lived life, he was brought into the office, even his job was on the line. And Mac could have easily said, I'm sorry, I won't do that anymore. I won't do anything. I'll stop talking about Christ in casual conversation. I'll stop playing my Christian music in my office, or whatever it was.

Wasn't breaking any rules, obviously, but he could have easily said that. But he leaned over the table, and he looked at both of them, and he says, hey, I apologize if it offended anybody. But I absolutely did nothing wrong, but I absolutely did nothing wrong in this office. I'm simply doing my job. I'm just living out my faith.

And if I have to choose God, who is ultimately, and he looked both of them in the face and says, you're my bosses here on earth, and God has blessed me to have this job. But my ultimate boss is him. And I honor him. And I will stand by him. I will not compromise my values.

I will not compromise the way I live. Live my life. I will not do any of that. If it costs me my job, I'm okay with that. And he made that bold statement.

And I will never forget that. Not only did he get, not lose his job, he got promoted down the road. And he was able to, and God say, God, we need, there's going to be times when people pleasing is going to come in the equation, and we're going to decide, we're going to have to make some decisions whether we're going to be Christ followers, if we're going to be Christ servants, or we're going to be people servants. And we can't please everybody, but we can please God. And we will be extremely worn out if we try to please people all the time.

You will be in a miserable place if you do that. And there's always going to be someone who doesn't like you. They don't like the way you dress. They don't like your hair. They don't like how you live your life.

They don't like your big house. They don't like your small house. They don't like your car. They don't like, you know, there's always going to be somebody that doesn't like something about you. But you cannot please people.

You have to please God. We see this even in church. I mean, it's crazy how church people do that about other churches and our church or whoever, you know. I don't like, I like to sit under this type of teaching. I like to sit under that type of teaching.

I can't believe you're a part of that church. This church, they do this or they do that. I had a pastor friend of mine in Goldsboro, North Carolina, Bridge Church, one of our overseers, actually, pastors church, pastors the church there now, a fairly large church that was growing rapidly at the time. And there was a rumor around the community that they had recliners in their church. How dare they have recliners in their church?

And obviously, that was kind of a joke, you know, or it wasn't true. They have recliners in their church, that relaxed church, you know. What in the world are they doing? They're sinning. You should sit in hard pews, you know, and be miserable because that's what church is all about, you know, being miserable.

I guess that's how some people think about church. But not only did that draw in people to find out about church, if they have recliners, I'm going to that church to see what's going on. They didn't find recliners in the church, but they found a comfortable seat, much like what we had. And not only that, many of them found Jesus in the process. And if we compromise based on what people may say about us, even as a church, or what, and I'm supporters of every church in this area.

I know most of the pastors in the nearby churches, we actually have breakfast and lunch and, you know, a bigger, I have the larger churches in the area. We are all on the same page. We have no problems. We realize we have 450,000 people in this community. And there's a lot of people that are going to hell, and we want to catch them before they spend eternity somewhere else.

And we're all on the same page, and we realize that. But it's hilarious how our church people act, how people act. We want to be, we aren't people pleasers. We're not going to try to be people pleasers. We're going to be who God called us to be.

We're going to stay obedient. We're going to go down the path we are called, holding hands together, reaching as many people for Jesus as possible. Because that's what we're about. We're not interested in pleasing people. We're interested in pleasing God.

Look at your neighbor and say this, I don't live to please you. Just look at him real quick. I don't live to please you. Because you don't live to please them. You live to please God.

Love people, but live to please God. Don't say it to your wife, okay? Darn it. I'm going to be doing a lot of marital counseling this week. Number two, live from the approval of God instead of for the approval of people.

Live from the approval of God instead of for the approval of people. I love how Paul said it to the Thessalonica church. He says, on the contrary, we speak as those approved, stamped approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel. We are not trying to please people, but God who tests the heart. So who sees our motives?

God sees our motives. Who sees our heart? God sees our heart. He doesn't live. We don't live to be approved by others.

We live by the approval of God to be entrusted with the gospel. What does this mean? If we are followers of Christ, we are approved to carry this thing called the good news, the gospel of Christ, the thing that transforms lives. Some of you here today, you believe. You believe with all of your heart that God can change lives, that the transforming power of God can save, that people can completely change, that the blood of Jesus Christ was shed for the covering of sins, and He rose on the third day so that we could live, so that this world could live, that we believe that He did not come to condemn the world, but that through Him the world would live, and we have a heart for people, but we do not carry the gospel message as if God entrusts us with it.

We need to be entrusted with it. He entrusts us with the gospel. And my worth isn't based on what you think about me, or your worth isn't based on what others think about you when you carry that gospel message, because you know what your daddy says about you? It doesn't matter what anybody else says about you, but you know what your daddy says about you? He says a lot of things about you, but he loves you, and he thinks you're the greatest thing since sliced bread.

I think about my daughter, Savannah. Savannah. Savannah. I call her Banna sometimes. I call her Banana sometimes.

I call her Vanna sometimes. But I heard, she was playing with a group of kids there in the neighborhood, and she's always the littlest one. She's the girl, and then Max has his buddies, and they're running around, you know, kind of back and forth in the yard. And I overheard Savannah one day talking to them, and they were running, and they're like, You're too slow. She says, I am not slow.

My daddy says I'm fast. And if my daddy says I'm fast, I'm fast. And I do tell her she's fast because I'm trying to get her to the car sometimes. You know, come on, girl. Come on.

I can't keep up. But she believes that she's fast because her daddy says she's fast. And Max, he's a great artist for his age. He's drawing sharks and he's got the YouTube stuff that kind of teach you how to do it. And I'm just amazed that he's able to look at that.

And draw it and follow those instructions. He's got a gift. And I say, man, you can draw. You're great. And he'll tell his friends, he says, my daddy says I'm a really good drawer.

I'm a really good artist. My daddy can draw and I can draw. And he tells me that because my daddy says that I am that. You know what your daddy says? He says a lot of things about you.

Let me just give you a few things that your daddy says about you. Your father in heaven says about you because people, they can say you're not these things. But God says you are something. What does he say? You are a new creation in Christ.

Did you know that? The bad is gone. The good is come in. When he transformed your life, you are a new creation. The old has gone.

The new has come. We know it says in Ephesians 1 and 7, he says you are forgiven and your sins are washed away. What does he say in Romans 8, 37? He says you are more than a conqueror through Christ. You are conquerors.

You are warriors. You can battle. You have everything that you need to battle the enemy. You know what he says about you? In Ephesians 2, 10, he says you are a masterpiece.

Isn't that beautiful? You are a masterpiece no matter what anybody says about you? No matter how much they put you down. You know that you are a masterpiece. You are the light of this world, Matthew 5, 14.

In fact, you are the, it goes on to say you are the salt of the earth. That's why we started this church because you need to be redeemed back to the salt that you are. You need to be redeemed back what God intended you to be. The devil stole your life. He stole everything that you have.

But God has come back and rescued you through Jesus Christ. And you are everything that you can be. You are the light of the world. You are the salt of the earth. And a little bit of salt, a little bit of you just goes a tremendous way in Jesus Christ.

Amen. You are filled. You are filled with the same spirit that raised Christ from the dead. Romans 8, 11. You have the same power that brought Jesus from the grave living inside of you.

That's who you are. That's who your daddy says you are. You are a joint heir with Christ. Romans 8, 17. A joint heir.

You know what that means? That means that you share in the abundance that Christ has. The authority that Christ has. You are a joint heir. Your daddy says, come in.

I have everything that you need. Here is the table. The table is full. Have a seat at the table beside my son, Jesus. You have everything you need.

You are an ambassador. You are an ambassador, 2 Corinthians 5, 20. You know what an ambassador is? It is the highest ranking position in God's kingdom. You stand in the gap for the king of kings.

You are, when he left this earth, he commissioned and gave us the authority to take the gospel message. The good news of the good news of who people need to, the things that people need to hear of who Jesus is, of who God is, and his love. And he, you share. You are an ambassador. And as I stand up here today, I am humbled because I am standing in the gap for Jesus Christ.

Those of you who serve in this church, you're standing in the gap for Jesus Christ. To serve people in this community. To serve coffee. To help with kids. To do tech.

You are an ambassador. You have the highest ranking position in the kingdom of God. You stand for Jesus. You stand for Christ. 2 Chronicles 5, 21.

And lastly, Romans 1, 7. You are greatly loved by God. You are greatly loved by him. He loves you. He loves you.

Even if you fall short, he loves you. And it doesn't matter what others think. God says you're called. You're equipped. And you are overcomer.

You are righteous. And you are loved. And all that there is available for you. He says it. He speaks it through his word.

He whispers it over us. He means it. He means it. And a very popular scripture, Romans 12, 2. I probably use it probably once in every series I teach because it's so important.

Do not be conformed any longer to the pattern of the world. Don't be conformed to what people think. It doesn't matter what they think. It doesn't matter how they act. It doesn't matter if they agree with you.

Don't be conformed to those things, but be transformed. Be transformed by the renewing of the mind. Romans 12, 1. Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God's mercy, to offer yourselves as living sacrifices. Holy and pleasing to God, this is your true and proper service.

Paul even says it like this. I am crucified with Christ. I'm a living crucifixion. The old man has died, and I walk in the new. We are living, walking, breathing sacrifices.

This is our pleasing. This is holy and pleasing to God. We live to please God, not man. Ultimately, what he's saying is it's not about us. It's not about our feelings.

It's not about what other people have said about us. It's about God, and it's about His purpose. It's about His opinion. It's about His authority. It's about His calling.

That's what, why we do what we do. That's why the church does what they do. That's why the kingdom of God exists and expands and keeps expanding and keeps expanding for thousands of years. It keeps going and going and going because we are a bundle of living sacrifices and changing the world one person at a time. The quickest way to forget about what Christ thinks about you and about what God thinks about you is to think about what others think about you.

But to reverse that process, the quickest way to know, to defeat those things that other people say about you is to lean in to what God thinks about you. My daddy says, I'm fast. You can't please everybody, but you can please God. Through faith and grace, I can please God. Let's pray.

Father, in the name of Jesus, we have to confess, God, that our ego is bent one way or another by what people think. We strive and we reach and we work and we do all these things that ultimately are meaningless outside of you, God. But today, we're going to make a mind change. And all over this place, you know, with heads bowed and eyes closed. How many of you admit today, just with a raise of hand, I'm a people pleaser.

I've got to work on that. Amen. Yeah. Yeah. Hands all over the place.

I'm a people pleaser. And today, we want to break that. God, I pray for all those hands that went up, Lord, today, that you would begin to change their minds, to whisper over them the beauty of the things you think about them, Lord. So, God, today, begin to change hearts, change minds, change thoughts. And as we stay in that moment, maybe there's somebody here today who's not made a decision for Jesus.

Maybe you're like, I've never given my life to Jesus. So maybe you walk away from Jesus, but you're ready to come back. You're ready to lean into the goodness and the love that he has for you. If that's you today, I'm not going to embarrass you. I just want you to lift your hand and say, pray for me, Pastor.

Yeah, I want to make that decision today. I'm ready to make that decision. Church, if you just pray this with me. God, I believe that you are the Son of God, that you died on the cross for my sin. I believe you rose from the dead.

You conquered the grave. I believe that today, not only are you the most powerful, most biggest thing that we can't even touch you, Lord, we can't even, you know, your magnitude is so, so huge. We were kind of disconnected from you, Lord, but I believe that you came down and you became mad so that you could have a relationship with me and that you love me today. So come into my life, God. Come into my heart.

Make me new. I give this to you. Amen. Amen.